Thunderbirds are Ho… Mo
Hello! I know, it’s been a while, eh? That’s because… I’ve been on holiday (or something), road trippin’ it around the UK. I know, mad, huh? Here’s my holiday diary. I promise it won’t be boring and/or tedious, and/or too long.
Wednesday 26th of July
Set off from Chelmsford! We stopped off in Bath for lunch (I don’t remember where, though, sorry). But we reached our final destination at about 4pm. Caerphilly, Wales. We stayed in a scraggly 2 star bugger of a hotel. The lady who owned it was being turfed out in six weeks or something, so she had stopped caring and stuff. It was alright, though, I guess. A room. Except we were right at the front, on the main road. Every time a car went past, our door shook. But the woman who owned it was pleasant. She was very fake tanny (or tanned?) and was this odd shade of ochre. Mmm. Doesn’t matter much, though. We were only there for a night. And we went out for dinner in the pub (The Friendly Fox, I think. It was shit, but the name suggested it’d be fun). And afterwards Tom an I went for a walk around Caerphilly. We say the Castle, which was actually amazingly beautiful. It was about 10.30 pm or something and it was all lit up with spotlights. I’ll try and upload a picture at a later date. Then we walked around this Welsh chav estate. That was fun. Tom got all scared and stuff, it was like, these people aren’t going to hurt you! 8-)
Thursday 27th of July
Set off to Betws-Y-Coed, Wales. We stayed in a three star guest house place, which was alright. This place wasn’t anything special, really. A bit dull, but the guest house was nice. We were right at the top of the place, on the top floor. And we plays Super Mario on the SNES here.
Friday 28th of July
Off to Keswick, in the Lake District. We stayed here for two nights. The hotel was four star. Quite posh. They had Mint Imperials in a bowl on reception. It’s safe to say we demolished a few bowls of them. It was pleasant here, really. We were near to the town, so we walked into town for dinner and such. And the second day we went to town to go shopping. It was nice. Quite small and touristy. Tom wasn’t pleased because, I guess, he goes on holiday to go to all the shops he can go to in Chelmsford or Bluewater. But I liked it. It wasn’t Chelmsford or Bluewater. It was nice.
Sunday 30th of July
Glasgow here we… came. For three nights. I really, really liked Glasgow. It was, essentially, just a bigger version of Chelmsford. A couple more Starbucks, basically, which is fin by me. And it had an underground system, which was handy. And they had a special Indie electro-pop club night on Tuesdays and Thursdays, which is right up my street, except when we went there they were playing fucking Razorshite and they’re new barf ‘In the Morning’ (essentially old barf, now. I think their new barf is ‘America’, which is still barf. In fact, their album is barf, except for two tracks. What a let down after Up all night). But yeah. I loved it here. Tom seemed to as well, mainly because he could go shopping in practically the exact same shops he can in Chelmsford, or Bluewater, or London. Because that’s what we travelled all that distance for… But I’m so sure now that I’d love to move there. It was like, perfect for me. And the accent is the fucking nads. The hotel was cool, too. They had mints, but they weren’t imperial. However, we ate a reasonable amount of them. I bought a bear here, from the Rangers (football club) shop. It’s blue! We named it Barry ‘Scott’ Ferguson after Barry Scott (Cilit Bang!) and Barry Ferguson (Rangers player), who I believe could possibly be the same person.
Wednesday 2nd of August
Off to the Loch Ness. We stayed at the bottom of the Loch, which was cool. The day after we arrived (the next day…) we went for a boat trip up the Loch, which was alright, except it was cold. And then we drove up to this castle that’s on the Loch, but this bored me. I’m not a castle fan. The only castle I seem to have ever found acceptable was this one in Caerphilly. But this one was just ruins, and it was quite boring. I bought a quill, though. I used to have a quill, but it broke, so I’ve now replaced it with a pink one. And I bought a pot of ink. I don’t plan to write a novel with it or anything, but it’s handy to have ink with a quill, surely. I also bought a bear who’s wearing a kilt, with a little sporran. I call him Scottie. I know, how original 8-).
Friday 4th of August
Set off to Edinburgh. The hotel we stayed in was my favourite. It deserved to be more than the three stars it was. It was fantastic. The place itself I guess was pretty average, but the people who owned it were lovely, and it was so homely, which is probably quite hard to do as it was practically a mansion. Edinburgh town was alright. It was like London, but without the underground system, so it was a bit confusing to get around. But they had quite a pleasant Italian buffet place which made very nice sage carrots and courgettes. Fucking vegetarian that I am, I couldn’t eat the spag bol. I didn’t have any pasta, actually, as I’m not a huge fan, but I love spaghetti, but they didn’t have anything I could eat, or that I liked. You know me, I’m fussy.
Sunday 5th of August
We set off to Hartlepool. I know. How random. It was really odd there, actually. It was a bit like a deserted seaside town. I thought it’d be inland, so I was a bit disappointed when I saw the sea (I generally hate seaside towns, except Brighton, obviously). And I also imagined it’d be busier. I know it was a Sunday, but it was still pretty grim. The restaurant we ate in was alright, though. I had mushrooms stuffed with stilton and apple. Nice. And apple crumble and custard for dessert. Mmm. My favourite.
Monday 6th of August.
We set off the Skegness. Butlins, Skegness, none the less. Tom wasn’t pleased about going to Butlins. Neither was Nan. I was excited though. I mean, if we’re going to go to some shite hole like Skegness, why not do something novel with the day and spend the time at Butlins. There were so many chavs. It was quite amusing. It kind of says something about the concordance rates between lower middle class England and chavs/hooligans. But it was cool. Obviously it was cheap and quite shitty, but it was cool. I had fun, laughing at the chavs. I’m not saying it’s right to laugh at chavs, because it’s not. But I mean, typical chavs, with their… chaviness. It’s hard not to, really. Just as I’m sure they laugh at ‘alternative people’.
Tuesday 7th of August
HOME!
So that was our trip to Scotland. It was cool. As I said, I loved Glasgow, and I’ll go back there for another holiday, if not to live their for a while. I’m actually really knackered still, even though I slept so well last night, back in my own bed. I just need some more relaxing time. It’s Nan’s birthday tomorrow, so tomorrow morning I’m going to go off to Tescos to buy some flowers and a card. And I’m cooking dinner tomorrow night, too.
So yeah, that’s all I can really say. Goodnight, god bless, peace out.
xxx
Wednesday 26th of July
Set off from Chelmsford! We stopped off in Bath for lunch (I don’t remember where, though, sorry). But we reached our final destination at about 4pm. Caerphilly, Wales. We stayed in a scraggly 2 star bugger of a hotel. The lady who owned it was being turfed out in six weeks or something, so she had stopped caring and stuff. It was alright, though, I guess. A room. Except we were right at the front, on the main road. Every time a car went past, our door shook. But the woman who owned it was pleasant. She was very fake tanny (or tanned?) and was this odd shade of ochre. Mmm. Doesn’t matter much, though. We were only there for a night. And we went out for dinner in the pub (The Friendly Fox, I think. It was shit, but the name suggested it’d be fun). And afterwards Tom an I went for a walk around Caerphilly. We say the Castle, which was actually amazingly beautiful. It was about 10.30 pm or something and it was all lit up with spotlights. I’ll try and upload a picture at a later date. Then we walked around this Welsh chav estate. That was fun. Tom got all scared and stuff, it was like, these people aren’t going to hurt you! 8-)
Thursday 27th of July
Set off to Betws-Y-Coed, Wales. We stayed in a three star guest house place, which was alright. This place wasn’t anything special, really. A bit dull, but the guest house was nice. We were right at the top of the place, on the top floor. And we plays Super Mario on the SNES here.
Friday 28th of July
Off to Keswick, in the Lake District. We stayed here for two nights. The hotel was four star. Quite posh. They had Mint Imperials in a bowl on reception. It’s safe to say we demolished a few bowls of them. It was pleasant here, really. We were near to the town, so we walked into town for dinner and such. And the second day we went to town to go shopping. It was nice. Quite small and touristy. Tom wasn’t pleased because, I guess, he goes on holiday to go to all the shops he can go to in Chelmsford or Bluewater. But I liked it. It wasn’t Chelmsford or Bluewater. It was nice.
Sunday 30th of July
Glasgow here we… came. For three nights. I really, really liked Glasgow. It was, essentially, just a bigger version of Chelmsford. A couple more Starbucks, basically, which is fin by me. And it had an underground system, which was handy. And they had a special Indie electro-pop club night on Tuesdays and Thursdays, which is right up my street, except when we went there they were playing fucking Razorshite and they’re new barf ‘In the Morning’ (essentially old barf, now. I think their new barf is ‘America’, which is still barf. In fact, their album is barf, except for two tracks. What a let down after Up all night). But yeah. I loved it here. Tom seemed to as well, mainly because he could go shopping in practically the exact same shops he can in Chelmsford, or Bluewater, or London. Because that’s what we travelled all that distance for… But I’m so sure now that I’d love to move there. It was like, perfect for me. And the accent is the fucking nads. The hotel was cool, too. They had mints, but they weren’t imperial. However, we ate a reasonable amount of them. I bought a bear here, from the Rangers (football club) shop. It’s blue! We named it Barry ‘Scott’ Ferguson after Barry Scott (Cilit Bang!) and Barry Ferguson (Rangers player), who I believe could possibly be the same person.
Wednesday 2nd of August
Off to the Loch Ness. We stayed at the bottom of the Loch, which was cool. The day after we arrived (the next day…) we went for a boat trip up the Loch, which was alright, except it was cold. And then we drove up to this castle that’s on the Loch, but this bored me. I’m not a castle fan. The only castle I seem to have ever found acceptable was this one in Caerphilly. But this one was just ruins, and it was quite boring. I bought a quill, though. I used to have a quill, but it broke, so I’ve now replaced it with a pink one. And I bought a pot of ink. I don’t plan to write a novel with it or anything, but it’s handy to have ink with a quill, surely. I also bought a bear who’s wearing a kilt, with a little sporran. I call him Scottie. I know, how original 8-).
Friday 4th of August
Set off to Edinburgh. The hotel we stayed in was my favourite. It deserved to be more than the three stars it was. It was fantastic. The place itself I guess was pretty average, but the people who owned it were lovely, and it was so homely, which is probably quite hard to do as it was practically a mansion. Edinburgh town was alright. It was like London, but without the underground system, so it was a bit confusing to get around. But they had quite a pleasant Italian buffet place which made very nice sage carrots and courgettes. Fucking vegetarian that I am, I couldn’t eat the spag bol. I didn’t have any pasta, actually, as I’m not a huge fan, but I love spaghetti, but they didn’t have anything I could eat, or that I liked. You know me, I’m fussy.
Sunday 5th of August
We set off to Hartlepool. I know. How random. It was really odd there, actually. It was a bit like a deserted seaside town. I thought it’d be inland, so I was a bit disappointed when I saw the sea (I generally hate seaside towns, except Brighton, obviously). And I also imagined it’d be busier. I know it was a Sunday, but it was still pretty grim. The restaurant we ate in was alright, though. I had mushrooms stuffed with stilton and apple. Nice. And apple crumble and custard for dessert. Mmm. My favourite.
Monday 6th of August.
We set off the Skegness. Butlins, Skegness, none the less. Tom wasn’t pleased about going to Butlins. Neither was Nan. I was excited though. I mean, if we’re going to go to some shite hole like Skegness, why not do something novel with the day and spend the time at Butlins. There were so many chavs. It was quite amusing. It kind of says something about the concordance rates between lower middle class England and chavs/hooligans. But it was cool. Obviously it was cheap and quite shitty, but it was cool. I had fun, laughing at the chavs. I’m not saying it’s right to laugh at chavs, because it’s not. But I mean, typical chavs, with their… chaviness. It’s hard not to, really. Just as I’m sure they laugh at ‘alternative people’.
Tuesday 7th of August
HOME!
So that was our trip to Scotland. It was cool. As I said, I loved Glasgow, and I’ll go back there for another holiday, if not to live their for a while. I’m actually really knackered still, even though I slept so well last night, back in my own bed. I just need some more relaxing time. It’s Nan’s birthday tomorrow, so tomorrow morning I’m going to go off to Tescos to buy some flowers and a card. And I’m cooking dinner tomorrow night, too.
So yeah, that’s all I can really say. Goodnight, god bless, peace out.
xxx
posted by Jesus at 10:12 PM
0 comments
