Oodles and Oodles of Noodles for Poodles

Wednesday 20th July
Arrived in Copenhagen at some stupidly early hour of the morning (around 3pm) and headed towards the docks for the WESTERDAM. After a long wait and a kind of breezy safety demonstration (involving bright orange life jackets *shudders*) we were setting sail for Tallinn, Estonia.

Thursday 21st July
Still sailing... Kind of a tedious boring day.

Friday 22nd July
DOCKED!!! Arrived at Tallinn at some incredibly vomit worthy time (about 5 AM!). Went on a walking tour around. Was kind of fun. We went to a load of old markets and bought some knitted winter stuff (gloves, hat, scarf) and a shot glass, and other random junk.

Saturday 23rd July
Docked at St Petersberg, Russia. Will be here for two days. We went on some kind of tour (all recollection of what i actually did truly escapes me though, except I know I spent all of my money)... Oh yeah. We went to the Russian Vodka museum. Was kind of dull until it got round to tasting the Vodkas. I honestly couldn;t tell the difference between the cranberry, the honey, and just the plain vodka. They all tasted the same. Nice though. Even though I hate vodka. And I couldn't eat the food. Was all Meaty or Caviarish. So I waited until we were back on the boat with their fucking exceptional service.

Sunday 24th July (Happy Birthday to Tom)
Still in St Petersberg. We went on a little tour around St Peterberg on this day. I have a photo of some sort of Saint, i think, who is on a horse that has a snakes tail or something. I dunno. I had my iPod on and wasn't really listening. I got a little bored at this point, but it was still pretty ok.

Monday 25th July
We docked in Helsinki, Finland. We went on a little boat tour around the lakes and stuff and I got sme pictures of some pretty houses and stuff (seriously, I'm not the kind to find arcitecture pretty, but it was nice) and we passed one of Kimi raikkonen's homes. Very posh area. Very pretty too.

Tuesday 26th July
Oh my gosh was this the best day? Me thinks it was. We docked in Stockholm, Sweden. And we went for a little tour bus ride around. looking at stuff. And then... We went to the best place in the entire world. The Ice Bar, which is sponcered by Absolut Vodka, so was highly potent with Vodka, let me tell you. And everything was made of ice. except the ceiling and floor. It was in a large air tight container (like a giant freezer) and everyone put on ponchos to go in. Silver ponchos. And gloves. You needed them. It was -5 degrees inside. And we went in and there were huge ice sculptures (what of, I have no idea, but they looked so cool (pun not intended)) and there were blocks of ice that were sort of hollowed out on the inside, with the shape of a bottle (of vodka?) and the glasses were made of ice too. Like blocks with a hollowed out bit the size of a shot glass. And then the bar tender man came in a poured everyone drinks (he had a furry hat on, ask me at school and I'll show you pictures of everything) and I had a passionfruit juice.

Wednesday 27th July
Docked at Visby, Sweden. We didn't go out though. I had a really bad migrain and only left the room for dinner because I felt like I would faint if I didn't eat something.

Thursday 28th July
And then we docked in Germany. A place called Warnemunde? Or something like that. We went on a bus and then we went walking on what was the hottest day (about 30-32 degrees) of the holiday. I bought a incense burner with a silver Buddha on it. And then we went on a little boat trip back to the ship.

Friday 29th July
And on this, our final day, we were back in Denmark, but not in Copenhagen. Oh no. We were in Aarhus (or Arhus, it's spelt differently all over the damn city) where we visited an old town type thing. It was a little boring. And then it rained. And there were black horses. Pulling carts on cobbles. It was like heaven. Very pretty. But before all this, in the morning there was a little disembarkation talk, which was cool. People got champagne, orange juice, or a mixture of the two. I had orange. We also got chocolate covered strawberries. Yummy! And then the cruise director man (I think thats what he did) told some bad jokes that everyone laughed at. Especuially one about foldng toilet paper to a point, and prunes. Worth a giggle. And then the crew went up onto the stage and sang a song and said goodbye with sparkly ribbons.

Saturday 30th July (Happy Birthday to George)
Docked in Copenhagen. The fog was so thick that you couldn't see the water from the boat. Really cool. And we went for breakfast. Very early Vomit worthy time again (6.30 am) and then disembarked at 7.30. Our flight was delayed almost an hour, so I ended up sleeping on the ice cold wooden floor outside gate D102 (the gate that the Copenhagen to Heathrow flightwas supposed to be on) only to be woken up 3 hours later because they'd changed the gate and we had to run across the whole damn thing to platform A17. Where we then had to sit for another hour and a half (more sleep). Then onto the plane, where I slept some more. And then the runway was backed up when it came to landing time. So that was an extra 20 minutes in the sky, during which time I was thinking about how the hell can an object as heavy as a fucking plane stay in the sky. I mean, birds, fine, they're light. But a plane? If a plane, why not you or me? Or Aunty P? Or the Poodle from down the lane?

Anyway, I got home safe (please don't boo and hiss too loudly, the Gods may hear and strike you down dead) and I missed the last few days at school. And I missed everyone (nearly everyone) and I hope you missed me too (again, don't disagree too loudly...)

But most of all, yes... Most of all... I missed my cats *said in sleazy bodyrockers manner*

I'm going to live forever in a bubble? Do you think I'd still be able to breathe?

Oh my blooming gosh. I'm going on hioliday tomorrow. I'm nervous as fuck. A cruise. How exciting. how dangerous. THE TITANIC.

I've got loads of packing to do.

Today at school was might might fine. Actually it was pretty damn good. I'm happy. It was a bit sad because i'm not going to be back there for a while. And also I won't know the results of our psycholology experiment. TRAGEDY.

I actually wanted to know what they were. Oh well, I'll find out at some point, I'm sure.

I'm so looking forward to the Russian Vodka Museum. And we're going to a place where they give you drinks in glasse made out of Ice. I think it's like an Ice museum or something. I think it's in Finland, but I'm not even going to pretend to be positive of that one.

Also I'm angry because I bought some DVD-RW so I could put some movies and music videos I have on DVD. Only they don't play in either of my DVD players, do they?

Oh well. I'm off for ten days and will miss you ALL (actually probably true, I'll even miss slagging Kirsty off (I still like her though))
So I'll update when I return home from my journeys. Next Saturday. 10 days away...

I DON'T WANT TO DIE

I hate to tell you this, but there's a big, greasy spot of peanut-buttery goodness on your butt

I've been thinking about Peanuts all day. I've gotta get sone. They've Hijacked my brain.

You need to Pee? You can Pee behind those trees. You see those trees? You could Pee behind there.
Stop Staring at me you squirrel pervert.

So it's been fun.

Tee's birthday tomorrow. Happy Birthday.

*Prays for good judgement*

We saw Madagascar yesterday. No comment. For a child I suppose it's ok. But from my point of view I wasn't that impressed, although there were some funny things in it I suppose.

I'm not going to forget about animal cruelty and the evil of zoo's just because it's a cortoon. It's not funny, not really. But i suppose not everybody shares my views.

I want to get another piercing for my brithday. Either Labret or right nostrel.

*Considers*

And maybe a tattoo if I can find something I like. Something that grabs my balls, twists them in the most painful way possible and screams in my ear 'GET ME DONE HOE, OR I'LL TWIST YOUR BALLS IN NUMEROUS DIRECTIONS THAT WILL MAKE YOU SUFFER IN SERIOUS PAIN.'

Except I'm female. So that may not work so well...

#206 - Monster

Excuse me while I go to pee behind that bush.

Is it a bad thing when you start writting the names of alcohols with capital letter? Are they really that important in my life?

Stupid questions beget stupid answers, ninny.

To spite my bad lifestyle, will I be reincarnated as a teabag?

Quote from my diary last night after a little too much Vodka;

I feel like I've reached my nirvana right now. I'm floating and relaxed and ultimately in a place of spiritual wellbeing and, erm... Nirvana.
Even with the light on and a niggle in my throat.
Heaven.
George: Why did the lobbster blush? Because the Sea Weed.
N.R.VA.N.A
??
Nirvana I meant. I just feel so enlightened right now. I'm going to meditate.


In all honesty, I think I fell asleep through meditation.


-EDIT-
(18th July 2005)

I would like to thank Laura Squires today, you're hollering and screaming fit earlier really made my day. Worth a right giggle.

Oh, and don't worry, You won't see me from the end of tomorrow until we're back at school, so you won't have to put up with much shit.

And whilst I'm thanking former 'friends', I'd like to thank Harriet Lawrence for blocking me and not talking to me after I sent you an email. Very childish. I'm disappointed. In both of you really, but you ever so slightly more. It's a shame you acted like that, but you know, if you are going to get all pissed off for a stupid reason, screw you, bitch.

It's in your face... But you can't grab it

I have that 'poem' think I wrote. I suppose I don't mind putting it on here. I don't like it, but I like the last verse. It doesn't really mean anything to me, I suppose because it's not how I am. I'd like it to be, like, intense. I was ging to make it better... But I was too lazy. I came across it today, whilst putting zoo pictures onto the computer. Check;

www.necrophagia.deviantart.com

In my scraps, for some pictures and my DA journal for the days events.

Anyway, this is the poem. Again, I'm not liking it, but I don't like to write poetry or similar. I like essays. Good, wholesome essays.

I've named it, 'It's obsession, baby, and it's the way I like it'

I lick the pillow you last laid your head on.
The side of the bed you slept on after we had sex.
I haven’t changed the bed sheets.
They reek of your sweat.

You were an abusive drunk and a drug abuser.
But that’s the way I liked it, baby.
You’d harm me and I’d always come begging you for more.
I was your puppet. You held my strings.

Don’t go thinkin’ I’m angry at you.
It’s nothing of the sort, my dear.
I don’t want to hurt you, no more than you hurt me.
I mostly want to thank you. You made me a stronger person.

You played a rough game, baby.
I bit you hard, you bit me harder.
But our blood would mingle and somehow I just knew,
I knew everything would turn out right.

What happened though?
You left and defied the odds.
You stayed away through all my Voodoo.
You strayed despite my spells.

You will come back to me soon, my dear.
It’s only a matter of time.
You’ll be hearing a crackling sound, but don’t you worry.
I’ll just be breaking your legs so you can’t run.

Hueva Dun Sed IQ Tests Dunn No Nuffin Is A Boob, Innit?

Your IQ Is 105

Your Logical Intelligence is Above Average

Your Verbal Intelligence is Exceptional

Your Mathematical Intelligence is Above Average

Your General Knowledge is Above Average

Damn Link doesn't work. Dammit. But you get the idea. I'm cleverer than all of you bitches.

Check it at;

http://www.blogthings.com/quickanddirtyiqtest

Are you a TRANSEXUAL?

I love today. It's been ultraly (?) fun.
Aloo fly
No
Aloof ly
idiot.

So Live 8 was on Saturday. It's nice that people are trying to stamp out theis whole world poverty thing, but I doubt if it'll work.

Shame really. But at least they are trying to do something. I mean I don't think the issue will go away, but it's better than all those people who just complain about it all and do nothing.

Like me.

I'm really cold. It's like all of a sudden the sky has fallen and everything has turned to ice.

In my mind at least.

We played pictionary today, which was kind of fun, but I play it a different way (the way I see things) so nobody really undersood.

So for instance, I did Barbie. I drew a lady (barbie), a man (ken), Hair (blonde), a car (BARBIEMOBILE!!!), and a tv (as in commercials)

It took a while.

I guess nobody thinks like I do....
Tell me, is that a good thing?

I'm actually pretty mellow today. I'm quite happy and relaxed. It's been a fun day.

I'm actually really tired now, and I'm trying to find an excuse for me not to have to write up things for Psychology, but I said i'd do it because nobody can read my handwriting.

You people suck.

Anyway. I'm going to do that now. Remember, worship me, lick my feet (or not) and always, ALWAYS shoot animals dead for sport (I'll get a slap from Rachel for that one)

And one quick question; Why does my landline phone tell me the duration of the telephone call, but not the number that is calling? Surely, for half the phone calls I get, I'd not answer the phone and therefore there would be no duration, if I knew what fucker was calling me.

That didn't make sense though, did it?

Boobies.

Goodbye.
xxx